I know I said the next blog would be dedicated to my lovely
tutors but I really wanted to talk about something that has been bugging me for
quite a while now. And that marvellous topic is depression. For several years
now I myself have become a victim to this and it is monstrous. Lately however I
have been attempting to be more proactive in trying to overcome this and like
everything else it is not easy. And it is not as if once you overcome it it
will be gone forever far from it. Any little trigger can bring it all back on
again.
There are many times when even walking seems too difficult
but one must push past the negative thoughts. Depression is not something to be
overlooked and after talking to my tutor I realise that people do take it
seriously much more so than me – the one with the affliction.
Some of you may know what it is all about and others may
not. Many people “suffer” from this. It hinders absolutely everything, physical
pain can usually be overcome but when there is this emotion inside you it
darkens and dampens everything. Every small task becomes excruciatingly
difficult. Facing the world just is not an option, I know from experience that
I would much rather hideaway locked inside beneath the duvets.
The things that will bring you back up will always appear
daunting. Simple things like seeing a friend, taking a walk, cooking (I love to
bake) are what will bring you up again.
Again I don’t mean to preach but I always seem to, sorry
about that but writing is one of the ways that helps me out. Somehow my fingers
and heart just type away and everything seems to flow out.
There are times when your heart is continuously pounding and
worried for no reason. You hide away from family, friends, uni/school and work
when in fact the avoidance makes it all the more worse. As hard as it may be
there are people out there who genuinely care and will do what they can to
help.
A few weeks ago after speaking with my tutor I finally
handed in my self- referral form for counselling. Usually I don’t talk about
myself much; the personal side of things that is, but like I said this topic is
really close to me and is something I want to share so that you all know – for
lack of a better phrase- that help is at hand. The first appointment I was
given I could not attend and after going through a lot of dates the lady making
the appointment was so very nice to me and I finally have an appointment for
next week.
You may ask why am I depressed but J that is something I won’t
share.
Sometimes it may appear that those with their heads screwed
on most tight, who seem to be perfectly focused are the ones to be suffering
from this affliction but that is not always the case.
As hard as it is for those of you in the same boat make sure
you try to remain proactive. The smallest of things make the biggest of differences.
Here is a link to our university’s counselling service:
I know where you stand, i've been as far as on anti depresants myself. They are no where near effective and made me feel far worse. Best way i've found to deal with it so far is physical activities. Go out and do somthing, completely the opposite of what you might feel like doing but it works for me. since starting uni in september i've found climbing to be the best relief, both physical and a great platform to make friends which always helps out. Good luck
ReplyDeleteThank you,
ReplyDeleteIt is true, for the last few days I have been making an extra effort to push myself out there and I do feel a lot better. Although, sometimes it is hard ;-)
The very best of luck you too x
Naz